It is more unique to adult learners than children.
And it is NOT that they can’t speak English.
It’s that they are too scared to speak English.
They feel self-conscious. They worry about making mistakes in front of their peers. They feel ridiculous. Embarrassed. Frustrated that they can’t command the language with the same eloquence as they can in their own language.
And even though it usually turns out that they actually can speak English, these fears and thoughts and insecurities block and inhibit them.
Of course, this is a feeling I know all too well as a learner of the German language.
But when I used to watch my son, before he became fluent in English, playing with other children in Canada – I was in awe of how it just seems to work better with kids. They just find a way to understand each other. They can somehow manage to push past the language barrier and play wonderfully with each other despite not being able to understand every word the other one is saying.
Because they don’t have the voice in their head yet that tells them there is only one way to understand each other, and that way is through the use of a common language.
They don’t have the insecurities that tell them they sound ridiculous trying to speak that other, new language.
They just play.
Without thinking.
Knowing this has been crucial in my teaching because so much of the time I spend teaching is actually spent building confidence, helping people believe that they CAN do it rather than focusing on grammar drills and spelling tests.
Because language is a TOOL for communication, but self-confidence is the KEY.
Or at least, being brave enough to just go for it is the key. Not caring about how it sounds or what the other person might think about you. Knowing that you are trying really hard and putting yourself out there and that that is enough.
And I’ve discovered that that transcends language learning.
In fact, I see time and time again as a coach, how important what we tell ourselves and how we talk to ourselves really is.
That hindering beliefs and self-doubt are more often the reasons why we never make the changes we want to make in our lives than our lacking skillset or abilities.
And I, for one, would like to change that.
What thoughts are holding you back?
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